How I Am

I think my idea of retirement might be to one day work a 40-hour week. ~Vince McMahon

Dru asked me yesterday how I was. Truth? I'm tired.

Here's the thing. Despite gabbing daily on this blog, I'm a pretty private person. The things that affect me the most seldom get discussed -- here or anywhere else. I'm the kind of person who only has a couple REALLY close friends and it takes a long time for me to be comfortable enough to bare my soul to anyone.

I know you've all had significant hints that things have been bumpy for me lately. Trust is, it's been more than bumpy -- it's been overwhelming and exhausting and very nearly more than I could handle. I had a bit of a meltdown last week. I hit the wall HARD and didn't feel like picking myself up.

I did, of course. That's the Type A in me... but it didn't make me happy, or less stressed and tired.

That fact is, my life revolves around the LASR/WC website. It's the first thing I work on when I get up, and the last thing I do at night. It's a labor of love, but it's killing me. It's also killing my business partner (who has a full time job outside the home) and the other ladies who work with me. Honestly, we all rather hit the wall last week -- we don't usually coordinate so well!

The good news is that I'm trying to take steps to help eliminate what stressors I can. I miss having a life: playing board games with my daughter, scrapbooking, cross stitching, even gardening (which I did precious little of this year). I didn't even do the cooking from scratch that I'd intended. I miss visiting all the blogs I love on a daily basis. And WRITING! How I miss writing. If I had a dollar for every time someone has asked me when I'd write sequels to several of my stories, I'd be rich.

Those steps will take place slowly over time, and some things will probably make me MORE stressed before they make me less stressed (like learning software that will ultimately make my life easier), but I have hopes it will happen.

Fact is, it has to happen. I don't know that I'll discuss things much unless they impact the blog, but behind the scenes, there will be changes. And hopefully, you'll start seeing a happier more relaxed me.

And that, to answer Dru (*G*), is how I am.

======================

You Are Ruled by Saturn

You are a driven and focused person. You always have at least one major goal in site. You are responsible and capable. It drives you crazy to sit still for any amount of time. You love to be productive, and you're definitely guilty of sometimes being a workaholic. You have experienced a lot in your life. You are very wise, and people look up to you.

What Planet Rules You?

HAHAHAHAHA... could there have been a more perfect quiz for today? And, yeah, it's 100% right on - well, maybe not the wise and being looked-up-to part, unless you count Dakota. *snort*

=========================