Wednesday, February 18, 2009

What, When, Where, Why, How with Michelle Houston

Today we welcome author Michelle Houston to the fun! Reading her interview made me want to watch "Monty Python and the Holy Grail" all over again.

Now, on to the fun:

What do you want to be when you grow up?

I guess a better question is what didn't I want to be when I grew up. I wanted to be a doctor, a police officer, a firefighter, an astronaut, a lawyer, an artist, an architect, a landscape designer, a scientist; the list goes on and on. I finally decided on teacher around the fourth grade, and I have been working towards that ever since.

Now I am a non-traditional college student, and I am working my rear off to earn my degree in Biology education, with certification to also teacher Earth Science, Physics and Chemistry. A glutten for punishment, I know.

Oddly enough, growing up, the idea of being a writer never really crossed my mind. I always read books, and thought of the authors like some people see rock stars and actors. The authors had just short of demi-deity status to me. Sure, I scribbled in notebooks, like a lot of youngsters. I wrote poetry, essays and short stories. I ever had a few earn awards in school - but I never planned on publishing. That just kind of happened.

Where would you find a purple people eater?

I'm not sure where its lair is, but if you could find out when and where the Loch Ness monster hosts its monthly poker party, I am sure the Purple People Eater would be there. My guess, he'll be sitting between the Green Giant and the Easter Bunny. He'll probably be hitting on the Tooth Fairy while knocking back a grape soda too.

When is the best time to read one of your books?

Late at night, when the kids are all in bed, and you can snuggle up with a lover. Just make sure you have lots of whipped cream (or whatever strikes you fancy) and a pair of handcuffs handy.

Why do you love Monty Python (because you must, yes)?

Well, I haven't seen many of their works, but I have seen Monty Python and the Holy Grail.

Scenes like this one just made the movie:

“King Arthur: I am your king.
Woman: Well I didn't vote for you.
King Arthur: You don't vote for kings.
Woman: Well how'd you become king then?
[Angelic music plays... ]
King Arthur: The Lady of the Lake, her arm clad in the purest shimmering samite held aloft Excalibur from the bosom of the water, signifying by divine providence that I, Arthur, was to carry Excalibur. THAT is why I am your king.
Dennis: [interrupting] Listen, strange women lyin' in ponds distributin' swords is no basis for a system of government. Supreme executive power derives from a mandate from the masses, not from some farcical aquatic ceremony.”

Quote from the Internet Movie Database. (

This is another good one, from the same webpage.

“Bridgekeeper: Stop. Who would cross the Bridge of Death must answer me these questions three, ere the other side he see.
Sir Lancelot: Ask me the questions, bridgekeeper. I am not afraid.
Bridgekeeper: What... is your name?
Sir Lancelot: My name is Sir Lancelot of Camelot.
Bridgekeeper: What... is your quest?
Sir Lancelot: To seek the Holy Grail.
Bridgekeeper: What... is your favourite colour?
Sir Lancelot: Blue.
Bridgekeeper: Go on. Off you go.
Sir Lancelot: Oh, thank you. Thank you very much.
Sir Robin: That's easy.
Bridgekeeper: Stop. Who would cross the Bridge of Death must answer me these questions three, ere the other side he see.
Sir Robin: Ask me the questions, bridgekeeper. I'm not afraid.
Bridgekeeper: What... is your name?
Sir Robin: Sir Robin of Camelot.
Bridgekeeper: What... is your quest?
Sir Robin: To seek the Holy Grail.
Bridgekeeper: What... is the capital of Assyria?
Sir Robin: I don't know that.
[he is thrown over the edge into the volcano]
Sir Robin: Auuuuuuuugh.
Bridgekeeper: Stop. What... is your name?
Galahad: Sir Galahad of Camelot.
Bridgekeeper: What... is your quest?
Galahad: I seek the Grail.
Bridgekeeper: What... is your favourite colour?
Galahad: Blue. No, yel...
[he is also thrown over the edge]
Galahad: auuuuuuuugh.
Bridgekeeper: Hee hee heh. Stop. What... is your name?
King Arthur: It is 'Arthur', King of the Britons.
Bridgekeeper: What... is your quest?
King Arthur: To seek the Holy Grail.
Bridgekeeper: What... is the air-speed velocity of an unladen swallow?
King Arthur: What do you mean? An African or European swallow?
Bridgekeeper: Huh? I... I don't know that.
[he is thrown over]
Bridgekeeper: Auuuuuuuugh.
Sir Bedevere: How do know so much about swallows?
King Arthur: Well, you have to know these things when you're a king, you know.”

How do you win at solitaire?

Win? You're supposed to actually win that game?

Wow … news to me.

Seriously though, I win more often when I play on the computer. Something about playing by turning all the cards by hand jinxes me. I have about a 20% win rate on the computer though. Not the best in the world, but I don't play that often. Generally just on road trips when it gets too dark to read a book.

Freecell is a better game for me.

Thanks for the questions. : ) It's always fun to do a silly interview.

And here's one more line from Monty Python and the Holy Grail.

“Narrator: A year passed: winter changed into spring, spring changed into summer, summer changed back into winter, and winter gave spring and summer a miss and went straight on into autumn... until one day...”

Born to ride on the back of dragons, to journey among the stars in a ship traveling faster than light, or to dance the night away in the arms of a mysterious vampire, Michelle Houston willingly shares the worlds in her mind in an effort to bring them to life.

Writing everything from short and sweet stories, to hot and spicy tales of kink, from contemporary tales of romance to erotic romances featuring Greek Gods, vampires and were-creatures, she has crossed sexualities and has gone wherever her mental muse has guided her. A journey she has never regretted.

With stories either out, or coming out soon, from Renaissance E Books, Phaze, Whiskey Creek Press Torrid, Cleis Press, Alyson Books, and Pretty Things Press, to name a few, she has many more stories just waiting for their chance to be told.

Beyond that, she has a love of the natural world around us (except for insects, spiders, snakes, scorpions, and she reserves the right to add more at any time) and hopes to share the enjoyment of the Earth with her students once she finally earns her degree in secondary Biology/Earth Science Education. Currently she's attending college full time, and is expecting to graduate in December of 2010.

She's married to a wonderful man who supports all her writing endeavors (even when her characters scare him just a wee bit), and is the reason she is even published at all. Her daughter is too young to know just what mommy writes, but she knows she wants to write too when she grows up, and already has a good start on it.

In other words, she is an ordinary woman, with an imagination that is only held in bounds by how fast she can type.

Her website is:
Her blog:
Her news groups:
Her writing group:


Ceri Hebert said...

Monty Python rocks.

Judy said...

All that was missing from this interview was the "wink, wink, nudge, nudge" in the answer to "when is the best time to read one of your books" :-)

It was fun!

Brandy said...

Great interview!

Michelle Houston said...

Glad you enjoyed the interview. : ) I had a lot of fun answering it.

Thanks for having me on your blog Marianne. It was a blast!

Michelle Houston