Monday Meandering

Every child is an artist. The problem is how to remain an artist once we grow up. ~Pablo Picasso

We had a pretty decent weekend... fairly quiet, which is always a good thing. DD had her art show last week. I wasn't impressed with the projects this time, but the class is for a wide range of ages and this time it included some very young kidlets, so the projects were not as complicated.

I did like the idea behind this handprint:


But her mosaic wasn't as difficult as last time:



And then there was this odd modernistic collage:



And a study of complimentary colors:



Still, she had fun so I suppose that's what matters -- not turning her into the next Monet.

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I read an excerpt of a book last week that nearly made me cry. The premise sounded interesting, but the writing was so poorly done and edited that, considering the excerpt was supposed to intrigue me and cause me to buy the book, it failed and also made me want to slap the editor first, then the author.

It went something like this, in part:

Martha ran down the trail. Martha loved to run in the mornings. It was pretty, and clear and the air was fresh. Mornings were her favorite part of the day. She was so involved in her enjoyment she didn't see the knife flash down. She didn't see it cut her throat, or the enjoyment on the face of the man who attacked her.

Sadly, I'm not exaggerating.

Those of you who are readers only were probably a bit bored. Those of you who are also writers should see several errors in this finished product.

First, it's all "telling". Apparently this author missed the lesson on "show don't tell".

Second, it slips from third person POV (Martha's) into some odd omniscient narrative, which is a no-no. Head-hopping isn't great IMHO, but in this one we don't have a second head we hop into ... we just get told what's happening by the author. If Martha "didn't see" what was going on, she couldn't relay it to us.

I nearly screamed in frustration. First, this author should have done her homework. But in the absence of that, her editor should have either NOT contracted this work or TAUGHT her the correct way to write this. Shame on both of them.

Something like this is how it should have looked for publication (I'm writing this off the cuff, so it's not perfect):

Martha's feet thumped the dirt as she ran. She filled her lungs with the crisp, cool morning air and smiled as she made her way down the winding path. Was there anything better than a morning jog through the woods? She didn't think so.

A snap of a twig was the only warning she got before the knife swung down and sliced the tender skin below her chin. The pain burned and she stumbled on the path, grabbing her throat with one hand in an attempt to stop the blood pouring from the wound. The last thing she saw as she fell was the look of glee on her attackers face.

It's a shame. Truth is, a good editor is the best thing any writer can have.

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You Are a Kiwi

You're a very outgoing person. You start each day excited about the people you'll see and meet. You're the type of person who's just comfortable around others. You are a very social creature. You are quite opinionated. You can't help but have a view on everything, and you don't mind sharing it! You are prepared for whatever comes your way in life. You plan for the worst and expect the best.

Which Exotic Fruit Are You?

Blogthings: A Fine Line Between Insight and Stupidity

The first part, not so much, but the second half is right on.

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Blurbs and Reviews

Everyone needs an editor. ~ Tim Foote

The difference between the right word and the nearly right word is the same as the difference between lightning and the lightning bug. ~ Mark Twain

I have two things on my mind today: blurbs and reviews.

I was looking around a new eBookstore today, and clicked through on some covers that caught my eye (I'm a big cover person ... if I find the cover repulsive, I have a hard time buying the book. I know -- not fair, but there it is) and the first one I clicked had a grammar error in the first sentence of the blurb.

I wouldn't buy that book if it was the last book on earth.

Seriously, if a publisher, editor and/or author took so little care (or had so little knowledge of grammar) that the blurb -- a short, 200 word ditty -- had a glaringly obvious error that my daughter would catch, what will the rest of the book be like?

A blurb is your first impression (except maybe the cover) and you should want to put your best foot forward. If neither the author or the editor noticed the error, then I'm truly afraid the rest of the book will be abysmally edited.

How sad. And, perhaps it's not a good assumption to make, but I do. When I see a blurb littered with errors (and I see more than you'd believe, since I read every review released by LASR/WC/Aurora) I want to cry.

Once I got as far as buying a book, opened it and found a wrong word usage in the FIRST sentence. Same goes on this -- the first sentence should be where the author and editor are most alert. And if this error was RIGHT THERE, then what must the rest of the book be like? I closed it and deleted it off my computer.

Life it too short to waste on bad books. What do you think? Am I being too tough?

I also use reviews as a resource. Not just the ones we post at LASR/WC/Aurora, but others as well. A comprehensive, well-written review will sell a book to me.

One of my reviewers has started a blog discussing reviews, and yesterday she posted on one of my biggest pet peeves: the "synopsis review", i.e. a 'review' that does nothing but retell the story, with little or no real opinion given. I'd love for your input and what you think about that.

I had a review done for one of my short stories that was nearly as long as the story itself and was literally a lengthy synopsis of the ENTIRE story, including the ending (which was written to be a surprise). I was flabbergasted. And upset. Not only was it not a "review" at all -- the reviewer never said one thing that she liked or didn't like, not even a "I liked this book" at the end -- but it gave away the ending (and the entire storyline ... why bother reading the story when you know Every. Single. Thing. that happens?). After much agonizing over sounding like a prima donna author, I finally emailed the reviews site and expressed my dismay that the reviewer had given away the ending. The reviews site deleted that part, but left the rest and it remains a review that I never point anyone to. It was absolutely awful. Sadly, this site's reviews are mostly written in this fashion, and it breaks my heart for the authors.

What do you think about reviews as a reader and/or an author? Am I being too sensitive?

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You Judge People Based on Evidence

You know better than to judge a book by its cover, and you don't make snap judgements about people either. You look at the facts, and you try to make educated choices. You never mind admitting that you're wrong. It's hard for you to trust people that you've just met. You always need to get to know people. You never go with your gut, but you may be surprised. Your intuition is probably more dead on than you realize.

How Do You Judge People?

That's pretty much spot on.

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Blurbs: The Good, the Bad, the Ugly

Technique is noticed most markedly in the case of those who have not mastered it." (Leon Trotsky)

I see a lot of blurbs on a daily basis... we post them with every review on LASR/WC/Aurora -- to the tune of about 60+ a week. And here's what I think:

Blurbs can make or break a sale.

If someone is looking to buy for the first time, a well-written blurb can really give them that extra 'bump'. For instance, I'm absolutely certain that my "warning" on "Kitchen Matches" was one of the reasons it sold so well. Here it is:

Warning: This story contains flying poultry, annoying older brothers, the occasional quote from Shakespeare, and enough sexual tension to overheat ovens—and engines.

So, a good blurb can help sell a book -- but conversely, a poorly written or poorly edited blurb can kill a sale, don't you think?

It's bad enough when a blurb is dull, but what about those riddled with grammatical errors, or those that don't actually say what the author thinks it says. I can't help but think if the author and editor take so little time with a 100 word blurb, what does the rest of the book look like?

Here are some I've seen recently (please note, I've changed them all slightly -- I've retained the errors, but have rearranged the rest so they're *hopefully* pretty unrecognizable). Can you find the errors?

1. Marine Core Sniper Bill Smith's attitude...

2. Can she be saved from the hoards of evil demons...

3. (Note: This one is from a time travel romance)... Events lead Mary to believe that John is from another time zone.

4. Joy and John Benning have lost their mittens. The Benning's can't seem to find them...

I could go on... and on... and on... but I won't.

What do YOU think? Would you buy a book with errors in the blurb?

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You Are Wiley and Smart

You're the type of person who can get out of any jam. You always have your wits about you. Other people find you to be a little dangerous! They know what you're capable of. You are always planning and scheming. You can't help it - your mind never stops going. You tend to outfox everyone standing in your way. You don't like to play dirty, but you will if you have to.

The Baby Animal Test

LOL... scared?

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