Blurbs and Reviews

Everyone needs an editor. ~ Tim Foote

The difference between the right word and the nearly right word is the same as the difference between lightning and the lightning bug. ~ Mark Twain

I have two things on my mind today: blurbs and reviews.

I was looking around a new eBookstore today, and clicked through on some covers that caught my eye (I'm a big cover person ... if I find the cover repulsive, I have a hard time buying the book. I know -- not fair, but there it is) and the first one I clicked had a grammar error in the first sentence of the blurb.

I wouldn't buy that book if it was the last book on earth.

Seriously, if a publisher, editor and/or author took so little care (or had so little knowledge of grammar) that the blurb -- a short, 200 word ditty -- had a glaringly obvious error that my daughter would catch, what will the rest of the book be like?

A blurb is your first impression (except maybe the cover) and you should want to put your best foot forward. If neither the author or the editor noticed the error, then I'm truly afraid the rest of the book will be abysmally edited.

How sad. And, perhaps it's not a good assumption to make, but I do. When I see a blurb littered with errors (and I see more than you'd believe, since I read every review released by LASR/WC/Aurora) I want to cry.

Once I got as far as buying a book, opened it and found a wrong word usage in the FIRST sentence. Same goes on this -- the first sentence should be where the author and editor are most alert. And if this error was RIGHT THERE, then what must the rest of the book be like? I closed it and deleted it off my computer.

Life it too short to waste on bad books. What do you think? Am I being too tough?

I also use reviews as a resource. Not just the ones we post at LASR/WC/Aurora, but others as well. A comprehensive, well-written review will sell a book to me.

One of my reviewers has started a blog discussing reviews, and yesterday she posted on one of my biggest pet peeves: the "synopsis review", i.e. a 'review' that does nothing but retell the story, with little or no real opinion given. I'd love for your input and what you think about that.

I had a review done for one of my short stories that was nearly as long as the story itself and was literally a lengthy synopsis of the ENTIRE story, including the ending (which was written to be a surprise). I was flabbergasted. And upset. Not only was it not a "review" at all -- the reviewer never said one thing that she liked or didn't like, not even a "I liked this book" at the end -- but it gave away the ending (and the entire storyline ... why bother reading the story when you know Every. Single. Thing. that happens?). After much agonizing over sounding like a prima donna author, I finally emailed the reviews site and expressed my dismay that the reviewer had given away the ending. The reviews site deleted that part, but left the rest and it remains a review that I never point anyone to. It was absolutely awful. Sadly, this site's reviews are mostly written in this fashion, and it breaks my heart for the authors.

What do you think about reviews as a reader and/or an author? Am I being too sensitive?

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You Judge People Based on Evidence

You know better than to judge a book by its cover, and you don't make snap judgements about people either. You look at the facts, and you try to make educated choices. You never mind admitting that you're wrong. It's hard for you to trust people that you've just met. You always need to get to know people. You never go with your gut, but you may be surprised. Your intuition is probably more dead on than you realize.

How Do You Judge People?

That's pretty much spot on.

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Blurbs: The Good, the Bad, the Ugly

Technique is noticed most markedly in the case of those who have not mastered it." (Leon Trotsky)

I see a lot of blurbs on a daily basis... we post them with every review on LASR/WC/Aurora -- to the tune of about 60+ a week. And here's what I think:

Blurbs can make or break a sale.

If someone is looking to buy for the first time, a well-written blurb can really give them that extra 'bump'. For instance, I'm absolutely certain that my "warning" on "Kitchen Matches" was one of the reasons it sold so well. Here it is:

Warning: This story contains flying poultry, annoying older brothers, the occasional quote from Shakespeare, and enough sexual tension to overheat ovens—and engines.

So, a good blurb can help sell a book -- but conversely, a poorly written or poorly edited blurb can kill a sale, don't you think?

It's bad enough when a blurb is dull, but what about those riddled with grammatical errors, or those that don't actually say what the author thinks it says. I can't help but think if the author and editor take so little time with a 100 word blurb, what does the rest of the book look like?

Here are some I've seen recently (please note, I've changed them all slightly -- I've retained the errors, but have rearranged the rest so they're *hopefully* pretty unrecognizable). Can you find the errors?

1. Marine Core Sniper Bill Smith's attitude...

2. Can she be saved from the hoards of evil demons...

3. (Note: This one is from a time travel romance)... Events lead Mary to believe that John is from another time zone.

4. Joy and John Benning have lost their mittens. The Benning's can't seem to find them...

I could go on... and on... and on... but I won't.

What do YOU think? Would you buy a book with errors in the blurb?

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You Are Wiley and Smart

You're the type of person who can get out of any jam. You always have your wits about you. Other people find you to be a little dangerous! They know what you're capable of. You are always planning and scheming. You can't help it - your mind never stops going. You tend to outfox everyone standing in your way. You don't like to play dirty, but you will if you have to.

The Baby Animal Test

LOL... scared?

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Blurbs and Dogs

“The great pleasure of a dog is that you may make a fool of yourself with him and not only will he not scold you, but he will make a fool of himself too.” - Samuel Butler

It's SUNNY out! Woot!! Of course, my thermometer reads 22 degrees as I'm writing this, but ... SUN. Sun is good. Warmth with sun would be better, but I'll take what I can get, because I am truly grateful I have sun and not snow like Sarita, or hail like Amy.

Maybe I can even do a little gardening today... **sigh**

Yesterday I spent in blurb hell. I have to create a "tagline", a 100 word description AND a blurb (like what you'd read on the back of a book cover) for "Kitchen Matches (or whatever it will be called)". This is agonizing work. I hit up some friends for help (thanks Allie, Judy, Charity and Ceri!) and am plugging away.

Somedays I think writing the book or story is the easy part.

Speaking of writing books, LOL, I'm working on editing Playing House again. No matter what, I seem to return back to that story over and over. It's the book that won't go away. Fact is, I really like my hero and heroine. We'll see what happens. I may get frustrated again, and put it away again, but...every time I open it, I get a little farther. So, perhaps before I am old(er) and gray(er), I will actually get this silly thing finished and out the door.

And, no, I haven't finished my mystery. I started to take the easy way out and have the murdered confess all... but decided that was lazy. So, now I have to figure out how to show the reader whodunnit without doing that.

Bother. Bother. Bother.

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Dakota did well in class today. Of course, we'd already taught her all the things she was supposed to be learning, so we cheated. Actually, she's really quite good at learning "tricks" (sit, stay, come, down, etc)... if I could teach to stop pulling the leash so hard that I get burns on my hands, that would be a miracle.

I've tried a choke collar, a pinch collar and a gentle leader (halti). I even tried all of them a the same time (hey, I used to ride horses using an English bridle, I can handle that many leashes at the same time). Nothing. Works.

The obedience instructor suggested I use treats to keep her close... just keep stuffing her full of treats so she wouldn't pull, and would learn that staying beside me is a good thing, but the fact is...Dakota is NOT food motivated. Have you SEEN how skinny she is? The instructor even tried hot dogs, and after a couple pieces, Dakota didn't care. She can't have cheese, because it gives her the runs.

I've tried the "I'm a tree" method of stopping and standing still when she pulls (again suggested by the instructor) and then walking forward when she loosens the leash -- the assumption being that when she learns that she gets nowhere when she pulls, she'll stop.

Uh. No. The moment I take a step forward, she throws herself forward again.

I've tried exhausting her before I do leash training by running her up and down the road -- me on the bike, her with the leash between her teeth, PULLING me down the road. We'll do it until she slows down (about 1 1/2 miles), give her a drink and then try walking.

She STILL pulls.

Understand, I'm not giving her a long leash. I make her stay next to me. But, it doesn't matter how long or short the leash is... she pulls non-stop. It makes it miserable for us, because I won't take her for long walks. I'm exhausted when I do -- my arm aches, my hand is all but bleeding.

Gah.

And so are the days of my dog.

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Okay. I'm good with that. :-)