Life in a Moment, Part Deux

I love my mother as the trees love water and sunshine - she helps me grow, prosper, and reach great heights. ~ Terri Guillemets

In a moment of irony or kismet, after writing my post Life in a Moment about making sure we tell folks we care today, yesterday my mom landed in the ER.

She's been struggling with being able to breathe for sometime, though it worsened dramatically. Her current doctor told her "you're old and overweight ... it's nothing that diet and exercise won't fix." So Mom changed her eating habits, lost a pile of weight, started walking more (she's 78 y.o. so couldn't exactly start running a marathon) and it only got worse.

On Wednesday, I looked online and found her a new doctor (one who would both accept patients and take Medicare -- many of the doctors in her town won't take Medicare). He got her in the same day. Ordered lab tests for first thing Thursday. Then, upon getting the results, the lab called and told her to go to the ER immediately.

She called me en route. We were both terrifically worried, obviously. Every couple of hours she gave me updates: I have severe anemia and need a blood transfusion. I'm bleeding internally, but they don't know where. I'm being admitted for the night. And then finally the answer: bleeding ulcers.

These don't develop overnight. I'm so glad her new doctor took the time to really listen to her and DO something. Her old doctor should be strung up by his toes. Shame on him for assuming she was a complaining old lady. He had the opportunity to catch this problem before it got so severe that it was life threatening.

Life in a moment .... Thankfully, I talk to my mom almost every day. I try not to miss any moments. I've lost one parent, and still miss him every day so don't want to make the same mistakes again. She's the only Mom I have.

In any case, I was a little distracted yesterday. I did very little except wander around my house and clean it. I didn't write or visit blogs, and only did the bare minimum of work that was urgent. I'll try to catch up today.

For now, though: Go... hug your mom if you can. Hug your kids. Hug your husband. Hug your siblings. Hug a friend. You never know what tomorrow will bring.

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You Should Bake Chocolate Cookies

You are easy going and fun to be around. You love to glory in each moment. You love to be in a crowd, and you know how to work it. You are good at getting people to laugh. You are confident and sure of yourself. You can handle criticism and don't take harsh words personally. You like to be the center of attention, and you love complements. You take both good things and the bad things in stride.

What Kind of Cookies Should You Bake?

Mmm... chocolate. But the quiz results? About 50/50.

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Life in a Moment

The most important things are the hardest to say, because words diminish them. ~ Stephen King

A few days ago, a friend IM'd me -- she and her DH of many, many years had fought terribly, with horrible things being said (by him). Though there was certainly grounds for hurt feelings between the two of them over what caused the fight, it was very extreme. She was devastated and he barely spoke to her. It was bad enough for her to wonder if it would end her marriage.

Fast forward two days ...

I got another IM from her last night. Panicked. Her DH had had a heart attack that morning. He wanted to ignore his pains and go to work, she made him call the doc from home. They were told to get to the ER immediately ... and as it turns out, that was a wise decision. The doc told them that any significant delay would probably have been fatal. Her DH is in the hospital now, stable.

But, it got me to thinking. What if he hadn't made it? What if he'd died with all that hate and anger between them? He'll have a chance to say "I'm sorry" now, and I hope he takes it. She'll have a chance to be a better wife. I know she'll take it. But life doesn't always give us second chances.

I lost my dad more than twenty years ago to cancer. I was young and had better things to do than spend every day with him when he was sick. Oh... I visited him. I did things with him, but I certainly didn't spend as much time with him as I should have. And worse, I don't remember ever telling him that I loved him -- things like that just weren't bandied around by us.

Even though he was terminal, it seemed as though he'd always be there. Then one day he wasn't and I lost all my chances to talk to him one more time. My chance to tell him I loved him. Life doesn't always give us second chances.

Last night, my DH was working late (as is usual). I called him and told him what had happened and said that, although the odds were against anything happening to either of us before he got home, I wanted him to know that I loved him. I gave my daughter an extra few squeezes last night as well.

Life doesn't always give us second chances. Why not make sure you've told those people around you who matter just how much they DO matter? We tend to feel invincible, but things happen. From car accidents to terrorist attacks (you think anyone expected 9/11 to happen?). I even have a friend whose husband fell out of bed, and it killed him. Yes, really.

Make the most of this moment. You might not get another one.

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